Ok, So I was putting away the clean dishes in the dish washer and for some unexplained reason, I started thinking about how I lost all respect for a certain junior.
This certain junior is not an unattractive guy, and when I was in 6th grade (he was in 8th grade), I had a crush on him.
Well, sometime later (I cannot pinpoint the specific time, but I do remember I was in my mom's car and we were going somewhere) I found out that this certain person drank. A lot.
That was pretty much when I lost all respect for him. He was friends with my brother, so I had been around him a lot, and I thought he was really funny and nice. but after I found out that he was a "whiskey-puking alky" (something i regretably said to his face) I wanted nothing to do with him, and I didn't want my brother to be like him too, so I told my parents that Geoff shouldn't be allowed to hang out with this certain person anymore.
I feel bad about that. Really. But as I moved on to putting away the knives, I wondered why my brother would want to be friends with a person who did these things anyway. I knew it was wrong (there are laws against underage drinking for a reason!) and I'd never hang out with people who did things I didn't approve of.
And this is where my musing gets really like "WHOA". I DO hang out with people (or actually one person) that does all kinds of things that I would never want to do. Ever. Things worse than drinking. But then again, my frined only does these things when he is with his other friends (and new girlfriend). When he is with people I dont "approve of".
He never really talks to us about the things he does with his other friends, but we still hear about it sometimes. He doesn't act like they do when he is around us either. It's like he has a split personality. Or a double life. He has a different sense of humor, different body language, and a different persona when he is with them.
When he is with us, he is funny, thats-what-she-said joke-loving, drummer friend. Emphasize on friend. He was completely there for me during the whole fiasco outlined in the blog "who do you think you are?"
When he is with them, he is perverse and law-breaking. Grungy, and Ick.
So it makes me wonder which of these two people is really him. I'd like to think that he is being himself when he is with us, but if it turns out that the real him is the druggie-ick guy he is with those other people, then I don't know if we can be friends anymore.
And that makes me very sad. :(
(see? there is even a frowny face to prove it)
So I conclude with a question for all 3 of my readers to take out of this blog and chew on for a while:
WHY CAN'T PEOPLE ALWAYS BE THEMSELVES?
5 comments:
wow... when i do the dishes i concentrate on not cutting myself with the knifes..=)
haha
Sarah said "Knifes".
...
Yeah.
I know who you're talking about...
Perhaps he is many different things.
People are not all just one thing.
There's many aspects to a personality.
Besides, if people acted the same way all the time they would be so simple and plain.
If the world were always all perky and cheery all the time it be pretty damn predictable, therefore, bland.
So what, someone lives two lives.
We all have skeletons in our closets.
Nobody knows what another experiences on a daily basis.
Why should we judge in the first place?
on the contrary bonnie...i would rather, ANY day of the week, be one who embraces the desire to live a focused life than a "dual" existence. too much deception for me. be good or be good at it is the old adage, and that doesn't mean splitting your time between the two. you kids won't understand the full-force angst associated with making unwise decisions for a while, i'm afraid. yet--and i AM preaching here, on the soapbox, nonetheless--i promise you that EVERY decision you make has some consequence, for better or worse. it is inevitable. one of my favorite thoughts comes from poet matthew arnold; he wrote fervently about "this strange disease of modern life, with its sick hurry, its divided aims." we simply cannot live a morally divided life. please, at least have enough balls make a choice, damn it, people!
k...off the box. my, that was refreshing. nothing personal toward anyone, but i had to set my side of the record straight.
i live deliberately. on purpose. to the death. in one of my absolute favorite books, a certain Atticus (ha) is described beautifully; mrs. maudie says, "he's the same on the streets as he is in his house." wow. that's the way i wanna be remembered.
bonnie spelled my name wrong =(
everyone left thoughtful,preaching comments...but me...
Aww man :(
When I tell people my opinions I want a response simply because I want to hear someone else's side to it.
I'm a tactual learner and challenge people.
That's just how I learn.
So I apologize if I offended you.
Sometimes I forget that the rest of the world doesn't work that way.
Sorry Sarabeth !
(I hope I got it right that time)
Oh and Krieg, I understand what ya mean.
I person who behaves the same no matter who their company may be has integrity. I'd much rather be a person with integrity like Atticus.
Mmkay.
I'm gonna go now.
Peace out.
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