Christmas!!!

It's only 2 days away now!
I just finished wrapping all of my presents (which I bought shortly before that. haha. Could I have procrastinated a little more?).

I spent $157.57 at Wal-Mart today, on 9 gifts, 3 of which double as birthday presents, too.
So, I'm counting them twice which makes my average spent per gift $13.15. Not too shabby.

However, that isn't counting the money I have to give my brother to make up my half of our mom's present... I think that's like $40, which gives me a grand Christmas total of almost $200.

OMG!! That's like 27 hours of work. Everybody better appreciate this big time.

I already told my mom that if anybody wasn't EXTREMELY excited when they opened their present, that I would take it back, because I didn't buy 1 thing that I wouldn't mind having myself.

Anyway, this is the first year I've ever bought ALL of my presents by myself (I wrapped them all myself too).

haha, I'm so grown up.

I would say that this is shaping up to be a great Christmas break, but I was grounded on Friday after school. I didn't even get to the official start of the break. :(
It's all Jeffkidd's fault. Oh well.

I'm bored with this now, and I'm pretty sure nobody even reads my blog anymore.

But if you do: HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

yay for me!

I made 100 on my transcedentalism paper for Mrs. Batchelor.

That makes me feel awesome... I've never made 100 on a batch paper before (though, let's face it, I've been close. haha)

Anyway, I'm glad that THIS is the paper that I did really well on: it was very personal. Really. Joe, I don't know if you even read my blog enymore, but if you do, I really didn't want you to read my paper, I wasn't just being weird.

This paper makes me want to cry every time I read it.

I wonder if Batch cried. I doubt, it but that would be absolutely phenomenal.

Ha. I love making people cry.
:)

That's all for now. You can hold your applause. I know that I'm amazing.

Motivation

I really really want to be one of those people who is motivated by letdowns.
Like if I make a bad grade on a paper, that it would make me try that much harder to prove that I CAN do it.

Unfortuantely, i am not wired that way.
As cocky as it sounds, there are just some things that I am not used to failing at, and when I do perform badly, i never EVER want to revisit that particular task. I want to give up, just turn my back on it, and focus on somehting that I CAN do.

So, some things that I'm bad at and that I gave up on:
- gymnastics
- college admissions essays
- Jacob's little hackysack rhythm game thing that he tried to teach me in BDA
- throwing a frisbee (although i eventually had an epiphany to try it with my left hand)
- running a long distance (or a short distance. haha.)
- probably a million other things that I can't think of right now.

So what does motivate me??
Competition, I know for sure.
Anything that I've tried really hard at, I can trace back to competiton.
I hate being second best, especially considering that i have been indoctrinated from a very young age that "Second place is just the first loser".
Seing that now, I am eerily reminded of the popular Ricky Bobby idea that "if ya ain't first, you're last" which is even identified as a twisted belief in the movie.

But what else?

What am I willing to work for?

I don't know.

I DO know that Christmas break can't come soon enough.
(honestly, that stems from my 'giving up' thing too; I'm not rocking school as much as i usually do so I want to stop... at least for a while)

GAHH!! WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO LIGHT A FIRE UNDER ME??

I wish I knew. It would make everything so much easier.
:/